Relationship Recovery
I have worked with so many clients who come to therapy because they are having difficulties with a relationship. It's a current boss or work situation, family of origin issue, sibling or extended family member. A friend or romantic partner who they are struggling with or even their child. They are overwhelmed and do not know how to go forward and sometimes they believe that they are the problem or they have the power to change the situation. How to get clarity and move forward is the goal, but there is not just one answer and generally these are complicated cases that require another point of view to sort through the confusion and find a path forward
Getting Clarity
01
What do I notice?
Often you will notice a pattern of behavior that seems to come out of nowhere. The person's perception is off base or does not align with your experience. They say and do things that do not fit your impression of who they are. This makes you feel nervous and on edge unable to find the right response. You may also feel responsible for the persons behavior but unable to find a reason.
03
Is something different?
This is not the way this person behaves all the time. There seems to be an unpredictable Jekyl and Hyde or two sidedness to this person. Has something happened for this person that I am not aware of? Should I give them the benefit of the doubt, after all everyone has bad days and we all deserve second chances. However, I do not get the same understanding from them when I am having an off day. Actually there seems to be a different set of rules that I am supposed to follow.
05
Does the other person want to understand?
This is a Paragraph. Click on "Edit Text" or double click on the text box to edit the content and make sure to add any relevant information that you want to share with your visitors.
02
How am I feeling?
You may notice that every time you interact with the person, you leave feeling confused, overwhelmed and disregulated. You rack your brain for the thing you did or said that caused such a strong reaction from this person. You make sure to "walk on eggshells" to avoid upsetting or even interacting with this person and try to predict how to "manage" them in the future. You learn that you feel very out of sorts when dealing with this person and you can not put your finger on it.
04
Can my actions change it?
It isn't possible to control another person's actions but is there something I am doing to contribute to this problem. How can I influence this situation and potentially make things better. It seems that whenever I bring up a concern, my partner/ sibling/ parent becomes upset and takes things personally. They seem to have a very different perspective and no matter how I justify, defend or explain my position, they never get it. And they say or do things that make me feel that I am in the wrong or it's all my fault.
06
What are my options
This is a Paragraph. Click on "Edit Text" or double click on the text box to edit the content and make sure to add any relevant information that you want to share with your visitors.